Jessica Nguyen Jessica Nguyen

5 Things The Best Managers Do During Performance Reviews

 
 
 

I will never forget the time I received a cookie-cutter performance review. Sitting across from me was the District HR manager, who gave me a copy of my written review. My eyes followed each word carefully as she read the document aloud. 

I was dumbfounded. Why did the review address my coworker in the feedback? I double-checked the top of the document to ensure it belonged to me. It did. I then realized that my manager literally gave me the same generic review as my coworker but forgot to replace the name “Tracy” with my name “Jesse” throughout the document. 

At another company, I always received positive feedback. All performance reviews led to a promotion, salary increase, or approval to grow my team. Until one day, I was let go due to no longer being “a fit for the company.” I did not see that coming.

At my last job, before starting my own business, I mainly received positive, if not stellar, comments. To develop my career, I was told that I needed to “build an executive presence.” When asked how to do that, my manager didn’t have a clear answer of what I could do except that I needed “more time and experience.”

As you can see, from three different companies, I received three ineffective performance reviews that either discouraged me or left me confused. I know I’m not the only one who has felt this way. 

After a decade of managing teams and facilitating training workshops on performance management, I’ve learned that there are five things that the best managers do when delivering performance reviews. 

1. They focus on performance AND development.

The best managers add a future development component to the review instead of just focusing on past performance. In addition to highlighting the employee’s strengths and weaknesses, you can also talk about the skills the employee has developed and can develop. 

Try this: After discussing the targets achieved and missed, end the performance review conversation by highlighting skills and competencies the employee developed from the various projects they’ve tackled throughout the year. In addition, coach the employee by asking them what skills and competencies they would like to build or enhance to be more effective in their career.

You can help capture the employee’s development goals on a Career Development Plan.


2. They advise the employee what to Stop, Start, and Continue.

Your company may have its format on how to fill out a performance review. If not, I believe the fairest and best way to structure your performance review is by sharing with the employee what you want them to stop doing, start doing, and continue doing. Highlighting what you want them to start and continue doing will help them see what success looks like.

For example, let’s say you have an employee who habitually shows up late to work but they excel at providing excellent service to clients when they’re in the office. You may want them to stop showing up 30 minutes late to work. So instead, you would ask them to start coming to work on time. And, you can encourage them to continue providing incredible service to the clients they serve. 

Try this: To help frame your performance review, think of the conversation in three different steps:

  • What the employee should  stop doing because it inhibits progress

  • What you want them to start doing instead to be more effective

  • What they’re already doing that you want them to continue doing because it has added value to the team 


3. They’re specific about the behaviors they see and want to see.

Feedback should be observable and specify the behaviors and actions employees can follow to succeed. In my Delivering Feedback class, I focus on providing feedback based on behaviors and not judgments so that the employee is more receptive to hearing what you have to say.

For example, you may observe an employee who is 30 minutes late to work each day (behavior). Because this employee is tardy every week, you may think that they are lazy (judgment) or they don’t care about their job (judgment).

How would you feel if someone told you that you’re lazy and don’t care about your job? You’d probably be defensive and want to explain yourself, right? Most people will feel guarded and not attuned to the rest of the conversation.

Try this: To help employees be more receptive to feedback, change a judgment into a behavior by asking yourself, “What did this person do to make me think that they are [judgment word]?” 


4. They help the employee see the impact.

When delivering feedback, one of the most critical items is to let the employee know how their behavior has impacted the job, team, company, etc. People are more engaged and productive when they understand how they add value and why they’re important to the team. Once they know how their behavior has influenced outcomes (whether positive or negative), they will understand what behavior they need to change or continue.

For example, let’s say you tell your employee, “When you don’t submit your portion of the project on time, it slows down the product launch because the marketing team has to wait for your deliverables before they can create the marketing materials.” The impact of the employee’s behavior is that it slowed down the product launch. The employee now knows that in order to not slow down the product launch, they need to not submit the project late.

Try this: To determine the impact of an employee’s actions, ask yourself, “Why is it important that the employee does X? How does doing X directly or indirectly impact the individual, team, or company?


5. They invite the employee to create the solution.

If you ever feel like you don’t know what to do to help the employee develop, then simply ask them. Or, if you have an idea of how to help the employee develop, let the employee share their idea first. 

People support what they help to create. A byproduct of allowing the employee to come up with the solution is that they will hold themselves accountable to achieve it.

Try this: Ask the employee, “What do you think you can do to have a more favorable outcome next time?” Once the employee shares their solution, you can also provide your support by asking, “What can I do to help you in your development?”

Not only do the most effective managers use these five techniques during performance reviews, but they also use them all year round because feedback is an ongoing process, not a once-a-year event. During the performance review discussion, there should not be any surprises, and employees should generally know what you will say about their performance. 

To learn more about what you can do to help make every performance review simpler, check out my blog on How to Make Every Performance Review Simpler.


Happy Performance Review Season!
Jesse

 
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Jessica Nguyen Jessica Nguyen

Create Your Blueprint For Happiness

 
 

The past few months I’ve been helping a lot more people update their resumes, which leads me to believe that more people than usual are leaving their jobs. Though the reason for leaving their current role may vary, e.g. not challenged enough, more money,  incompetent manager, etc., most struggle to articulate what it is that they want to do in their next opportunity.

Like many people during this Great Resignation era, you may have found yourself at a fork in the road and become a bit more introspective, and ask yourself Am I working too much? Am I happy? What the heck am I doing with my life?

If this was you, did you find your answers--or were you stumped?

Fortunately for me, I love what I do, so I don’t plan to update my resume anytime soon. 

I’m happy with where I am today, professionally and personally. A lot of my success has to do with luck, hard work, and privilege, but before acknowledging any of that, I needed to have some sort of vision or purpose. Angela Duckworth calls this the life philosophy in her book Grit.

My life philosophy written in Pete Carroll’s excerpt in Angela Duckworth’s Grit

To take that vision further, I created my map for happiness, a personal compass to guide my aspirations.

Jesse’s Blueprint for Happiness

  • Helping someone learn something new

  • Being able to make my own choices / calling the shots

  • Spending time with family

I’ve always valued the needs for meaning, autonomy, and love. If I’m helping others learn, I’m happy. If I am in control of my decisions, I’m happy. If I have the flexibility to spend time with my family whenever I want, I am happy.

So how has following my blueprint for happiness manifested itself in my work and family life? Since I founded my Talent Development business, I have been my own boss, and I call the shots on everything. I work an average of 20 hours a week upskilling teams, coaching individuals and managers, and building free resources for professional development. The rest of my time is spent raising two young daughters with my husband.

Now, some of you may think that’s not the life you want, and that’s okay. For me, it is. I believe happiness in your career (and life) has much to do with balancing two ideas-- a clear and practical definition of what success looks like to you with an understanding of when to stop chasing. 

I vividly remember a phone call I had with my dad when I was still in corporate America. He knew I was looking to leave my job partly because of a manager I didn’t respect and partly because I didn’t get the promotion I felt I deserved. He responded, “You need to learn when to stop. Be happy with what you have.” 

This was a shock to hear because, like many of us, I have been conditioned to believe that more money and power equals success, so you don’t stop until you reach the top.  But through experience, significant life changes, and speaking to people on my People Podcast about their definition of success, I realized that success is determined by what matters to you and not what society wants us to believe.

We all have needs.

In my Communicating with Empathy class, I teach that we all have similar underlying needs. In order to surround ourselves with positive feelings like happiness, we need to constantly recenter ourselves to get our needs met. As mentioned earlier, I have a need for meaning and to help others. When I offer my help, but the person doesn’t accept it, I fear I’m irrelevant. When I am facilitating a training workshop and providing someone in the class with an “a-ha” moment, I feel engaged. 

The way we get our needs met may differ. To me, autonomy means not working for another manager ever again. To you, it may mean working with a boss who provides you with the space to take risks and invites you to share your ideas without fear of being judged.

What’s a simple way to identify your needs and create your blueprint for happiness?

Take a look at this list of common needs below and consider the following questions. This is a useful framework to use when determining what you need in your next job, manager, and company culture.

  • Which of these needs resonates with you most? Why?

  • Think of the type of people you want to work with. What needs do they value?

  • What are some ways/strategies you can get these needs met? For example, Autonomy can be met through flexible working arrangements and High Standards can be met through a culture of accountability.

The 9 Most Common Needs at Work from Feed Learning’s Communicating with Empathy training workshop

What if you don’t know what you want?

Some people don’t know what they want, and that’s absolutely normal. We’re often so busy solving other people’s problems that we forget to think about what truly matters to us. If what you want is obscure, perhaps think of the opposite of it. Meaning, what do you not want? What makes you feel disengaged at work? Which of these needs that, if missing, would cause you the most stress or unpleasant feelings? 

Here’s a sample list of what someone does not like / not want:

Behavior Unmet Need
Unclear expectationsClarity/Meaning
People who only think about themselvesConsideration
People who take credit for your workRecognition

In the example above, Clarity/Meaning, Consideration, and Recognition are needs that are important to this person. With that in mind, this individual may want to surround themself with people and spaces that allow them to get these needs met. For example, they may look for a manager who is clear and transparent in their communication (Clarity/Meaning), a company with a strong culture of teamwork and collaboration (Consideration), or a manager who recognizes employees by giving both positive and constructive feedback (Recognition). 

You can determine this during the interview process by asking questions like How would you describe the company culture? How would you describe the manager’s leadership style? What does the company’s strategy and goal setting process look like? Any environment that does not foster these needs will most likely compromise this person’s happiness.

What should I do next?

So, take a pause and think about where you’re at in your journey. I’d love to hear from you. Are you where you want to be? If you are, why do you think that is? If not, imagine what’s important to you and what you’ll need to do to be happy.

Click here for a simple exercise to create your Blueprint for Happiness.

Cheers,
Jesse

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Jessica Nguyen Jessica Nguyen

How to Ask for a Raise

 
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Having to ask for a raise is uncomfortable and goes against my natural tendencies. My parents raised me to “be thankful for what you have,” but at the same time, I have a need to feel valued and appreciated. If you’re not paying me what I think I am worth, then no amount of thank you’s or praise in front of the team will make me feel valued as more money in my bank account.

I’ve been denied multiple requests for raises in my career, and I couldn’t understand why my argument wasn’t apparent to my managers. It wasn’t until I spoke with my mother-in-law, a top HR leader in the healthcare industry, that I realized I was doing this all wrong. So here’s a summary of what I’ve learned throughout my trial and error. If you like what you read, be on the lookout for Erin O’Connor’s episode on Season 2 Feed Learning People Podcast. 

What we’ll cover:

  • Understand the perspective of the decision-maker

  • Determine how you’ll frame your request

  • Remove these phrases 

  • Have a contingency plan

 
 
Image source pexels-pixabay-326536.jpg
 
 

1. Understand the perspective of the decision-maker 

It’s a zero-sum game. The way it typically works is each year, managers receive a budget to spend X dollars for the team, and it’s a zero-sum game--meaning, you getting more means someone else may get less. 

It’s cheaper to give you a raise than to replace you. The cost of replacing an employee can range from one-half to two times the employee’s annual salary. (Gallup) A good manager knows that it’s going to take a lot of time and work to replace you, so giving you a 10% raise to avoid having to search for someone new is ideal--that is, if the manager values you.

It’s all about timing. Many organizations have an annual compensation season when all raise and promotion decisions are made. If you missed the timing, you might have to wait until the next cycle, so it’s important to ask during this time so your manager puts you into consideration. Some companies are more flexible than others, but generally, it’s easier to ask for a raise during the compensation review period than off-cycle. Make sure you get your request in before decisions are made. Often by the time you are getting your review, the die has been cast.

 

TECHNIQUE: If you don’t know your organization’s compensation process, ask your manager or HR: “When and how does the company make decisions around pay raises? Can I get a framework to understand when decisions are made and how they’re contemplated?”


Your boss answers to someone else. Your boss often does not have full control over your compensation, so be mindful before you push very hard. Sometimes a denied raise request may be a reflection of the relationship between your boss and their boss, not necessarily a reflection of you.

 

TECHNIQUE: To give yourself a better chance, ask your boss, “I understand you have to get approval from your boss. How can I help make it easier for you when you make this request to your boss on my behalf? I’m happy to supply any info you think would be helpful.”

Managers don’t like surprises. Managers would personally like to avoid losing a flight risk and be given a chance to retain you before you decide to leave the company. So if you’re unhappy about your pay, let them know. In general, people like to be given a heads up and not be placed on the spot. 

 

EXAMPLE: “Hi! I wanted to set up some time to talk about my compensation. Can I schedule some time on your calendar next week?”

 
 
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2. Determine how you’ll frame your request

Next, let’s talk about the information you want to include in your request to your boss.

Compile your achievements. Iterate all of your accomplishments to the value of your boss, the team, and the organization. Quite often, your boss may not be very aware of everything you do, especially if it’s behind-the-scenes work and not things that directly impact the bottom line, i.e., onboarding, mentorship, helping with updating process documentation, etc. Rarely are these things formal expectations and goals of the role, but they bring a ton of value and are often overlooked by bosses. You own your development, and you own your career - no one will ever care about your pay as much as you do, so you should dedicate time and effort to manage it.

 

TECHNIQUE: Create a brag document where you add all of the awesome projects you worked on, the results you’ve achieved, and the impact you’ve made on the company. This is an ongoing document you add to over time and prevents you from accidentally forgetting your past accomplishments. Refer back to this document during compensation and performance reviews.

 

TIP: Only ask for a raise if your performance is in good standing or you have improved in the opportunity areas from your previous performance review. You will most likely be denied a raise if you have current performance gaps.

Do market research. Get your hands on salary ranges for the job title you are doing, not necessarily the job title you have. Let’s say your job title is Financial Analyst, but your job duties are what a Senior Financial Analyst is doing, then compare yourself to a Senior Financial Analyst. Sometimes the job title you find won’t exactly reflect all of your responsibilities, so use your best judgment. 

It is very valuable (for you and the company) to compare your salary to those of your direct competitors, or even those in your own organization if you have that data available. Managers generally know the internal and external market information, but knowing that you know makes your flight risk greater. 

Go into the conversation with a number you are aiming to receive and rationalize why that number. This number should be in terms of the value you’re bringing to the job. (Remember that your manager will most likely counter with a lower number, so adjust accordingly). 

 

TECHNIQUE: Google search job descriptions that match the title you’re doing and use compensation calculator tools like salary.com, payscale.com, or levels.fyi to research what others with this title are making.

 

TIP: If it turns out your research indicates you are already paid at the market rate, you are going to have to come up with a very strong rationale for why you should receive a raise.

Quantify your value. Saying that you successfully created a product and launched it to millions of customers is not enough. That may be your core job, so why would the company pay you more if you’re just doing what you’re expected to do? Instead, if you can translate your value and impact to the company in a dollar sense, your request for a raise will be more justifiable because if your manager can see that you increased revenue or saved expenses, some of that money gained or saved can be given to you. It is important to understand what the company values and frame your request in that language.

 

EXAMPLE OF WHAT WON’T WORK: “It took me 750 hours to create 5 different professional development training courses for employees last year. The employees loved them. We received high NPS scores, and more employees are attending the training sessions than ever before.” (There are numbers in this statement, but none of those numbers talked about the business’s bottom line).

 

EXAMPLE OF WHAT WILL WORK: “The professional development courses I developed last year focused on aspects of psychological safety, emotional intelligence, vulnerability, and diversity and inclusion. We received only positive feedback from those sessions. By teaching our managers how to build trust on the team and encouraging career discussions, we reduced regrettable turnover by 6%. I am confident that our managers had those crucial conversations with their teams--they utilized the skills they learned from the training sessions. This 6% turnover reduction saved the company well over $2 million because we did not have to recruit, hire, train, and onboard a replacement.”

 

TECHNIQUE: Ask yourself these series of questions to help quantify your value.

  • How did my accomplishments positively impact individuals, the team, and the company?

  • How much time or money did the company save, or how much revenue did the company make, because of the direct or indirect impact I made on the company? 

 
 
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3. Remove these phrases from your request

Don’t threaten to leave. You may have heard people say don’t threaten to leave unless you already have a job lined up. By saying “I’m going to leave if I don’t get my raise” or “I could get so much more if I go somewhere else” removes a sense of teamwork and camaraderie. I recommend not to threaten at all because the tension can build animosity towards one another. 

Don’t use entitlement language. Don’t say things like “I deserve a raise” or “I’m the best one here, so I should get a raise” or “I’ve been here for two years, so I’m due for a raise.” Your manager wants to see you succeed, but they can be taken aback by language that shows a sense of deservingness without gratitude. Triggering this adverse reaction can make others not want to help you. Instead, use more neutral or positive language that shows collaboration.

 

EXAMPLE: “I love working here and am invested in seeing the company grow. At the same time, I also want to feel that I am being paid fairly for the contributions and impact I made this past year.”

Don’t boast about how hard you’re working. Your main argument for getting a raise should not be “I’m working long hours and am doing the job of three people.” Bosses don’t always know all the effort you put into the work you do, so it’s good to give them some context, but the best way to help your manager see your impact on the company is with the dollar.

 

EXAMPLE: “I understand we had to cut several positions that took out 125K out of the budget. I’ve been fulfilling 50% of the roles that come out. Can we take 25% of that budget to allocate to my salary to fulfill the goals?” (Focus on the money and not the hours you worked). 

 

EXAMPLE: “My job title is Financial Analyst, but my more advanced job duties are more aligned to a Senior Analyst role. I believe my salary should reflect what I’m doing today, not the job I was doing six months ago.” (Focus on your job responsibilities and not the hours you worked).

 
 
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4. Have a contingency plan

Always know your bottom line and what you’re willing to do if the answer is no. 

Your manager denies your request without explanation.

 

TECHNIQUE: If your manager says they don’t think you qualify for a raise, get a better understanding of the reason behind their decision, i.e., “Can you help me understand where I can improve to be better qualified for a raise next time?” If it doesn't seem like they can provide concrete details, consider going where you feel valued. 

Your manager says there is no budget. I’ve heard that money can be found if you’re important enough, but I also think there may be some legitimate times when the company can’t give you a raise due to issues such as the company not meeting revenue targets.

 

TECHNIQUE: If your request is denied, ask your manager when you can revisit the conversation. If you plan to stick around until then, consider requesting for other options that can help you feel compensated fairly without the extra money in the bank, i.e., working from home more, relief of certain project responsibilities, etc.

Your manager says they’ll consider your request.

 

TECHNIQUE: If your manager has not followed up on your request after 1-2 weeks, ask them, “Do you have an update on our compensation discussion?”

 

I get how it can be intimidating to ask for a raise. Not knowing what to say or do can prevent us from taking any action. Considering the techniques we mentioned above, you can increase your chances of getting that raise when you articulate your worth without being arrogant about it. 

Remember that you own your career. If you want something, don’t rely on your manager. You have to put the work into it.

I hope you found this blog helpful. 

Cheers,
Jesse

 
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Dao Nguyen Dao Nguyen

Communicating with Empathy

 

(5-minute read)

Image by Negative Space
 
 

I was at the lowest point in my life living alone in San Francisco a few days after New Year’s back in my 20’s. Although I felt deeply lonely, I didn’t phone a friend because I didn’t want to burden them with my feelings. The truth was, I didn’t even know what I was feeling. Part of me no longer wanted to live. Part of me was terrified of dying.

Then my little sister called to ask how I was. I almost didn’t pick up. I felt ashamed but we had a good relationship and I trusted her enough to share that I wasn't well. We talked for only 10-15 minutes and, yet, after the call, I think a burden lifted and I felt at ease and considerably less lonely. She did not know it then, but her taking a moment to listen made the difference between life and death. Perhaps an exaggeration. Perhaps not. But that call highlighted, for me, the importance of empathy.

Empathy is not a magic bullet. It’s not going to solve all of your problems. That said, learning how to listen to yourself and others will help identify reasons for the conflict. A common mistake people make, in their desire to help, is to jump to problem-solving in the form of advice or reassurance. People don't care about what you know until they know that you care. 

When you’re willing to hear what is important to someone else, it’s much more likely they will be willing to hear you and come to a resolution.

What is empathy?  

Empathy is a language of listening. Have you ever visited a place where nobody speaks English? Perhaps you felt frustrated not being able to understand what someone was saying. Empathy helps us understand people who don’t speak our “language.” Someone who is very different from us, someone we just don’t “get.”

Empathy is also a path. To me, there are two paths in empathy. The intellectual path involves thinking and the emotional path involves feeling. Both ways lead you towards understanding what someone is needing and feeling.  

Most importantly, empathy is a skill. We are taught how to read, write, and do arithmetic, but not listening. It is one of the most essential life skills yet it’s rarely ever taught in the classroom.

Who can use empathy?

Empathy is important for anyone in a relationship, whether that be with a romantic partner, a work partner, or with your parents. This means any and everyone can use empathy. Even if you're stranded on a deserted island, you’re relating with yourself. In the movie Castaway, Tom Hanks befriends a volleyball as a way to provide empathy for himself.

Listening has traditionally been seen as a feminine quality or soft skill employed by patient mothers and sensitive nurses in care-taking roles. But both men and women in competitive fields like tech and finance are beginning to understand that empathy is a powerful tool in getting-things-done. When you’re able to understand what drives others, results come much faster.

Whether you’re a mother who wants to potty train their child or a manager who wants more productivity from your employees, you can use empathy to improve the quality of your connections and get quicker results in your relationships.

How do you improve empathy?

Empathy is a muscle. Lift weights and you get stronger. Work out your listening muscles and your ears get bigger. They may physically appear the same but people will see a noticeable difference in your ability to hear them. 

Here are 3 exercises to beef up your binaural muscles:

1. Identify Feelings 

Learning how to recognize what someone might be feeling is like learning any new language. You first need to develop a vocabulary. For example, if your boss came to you with a grimace on their face and a glare in their eyes, you might guess that they are frustrated or angry

Accurately assessing someone’s feelings takes practice and the more you do it, the better you’ll get. Knowing how someone is feeling helps us respond to them appropriately. 

If you want help increasing your awareness of feelings, explore this chart. Then, go through the list of people closest to you and consider how they are feeling given what’s currently going on in their life.

 
Image created by Bret Stein

Image created by Bret Stein

 

2. Identify Values 

Values help us to determine what is important to us. They also motivate us to take action. Take money for example. I work not because I value little green pieces of paper with dead presidents on them. I work because I value the process of creating, of contributing to my boss, and the security and freedom that money provides. When something we value is not being met, we experience negative feelings. When we have clarity and alignment with our values, we feel positive emotions.

If you want help building your vocabulary of values (also referred to as needs), explore this chart. Consider what you value and the people closest to you value.

 
Image created by Jim & Jori Manske, CNVC Certified Trainers in NVC

Image created by Jim & Jori Manske, CNVC Certified Trainers in NVC

 

3. Be Curious and Objective

Sometimes, we prejudge a person out of a need to categorize and make sense of our world. For example, I asked a Caucasian couple for food once while riding a Greyhound bus. I was famished, desperate, and willing to pay. They smiled at me but nodded their heads “no.” I understand a “no,” but why smile to rub it in? It seemed a bit sadistic.  The man asked me, “Se habla Español?” Only after a few clumsy exchanges did I realize this “white” couple were non-English speaking Mennonites from Mexico. This piqued my interest and I asked them questions about their community and life in Spanish. I realized that I had misinterpreted their body language. They smiled because they wanted to show warmth and nodded “no” because they didn’t understand English. When the couple realized I had asked to buy some food from them, they insisted on giving me three pounds of Mennonite cheese. Remember: “When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me.” 

You can practice many of these skills with yourself first. For example, a friend canceled on plans you made together last minute. Ask yourself, 

  • What is it that I’m feeling? (Perhaps confused, hurt, or disappointment)

  • What value or need is not being met? (Perhaps clarity, dependability, or mutuality)

  • What could be another explanation besides the negative judgment you assumed? (Perhaps a pipe burst in their house. In this light, “sorry, need to cancel” might mean something different to you).

4. Make Learning Social

If you just read this, you have some awareness, but if you really want to be a better listener, consider making empathy a daily practice and exercise those ears.

Back in High School, I wanted to get buff because I wanted to be more attractive. Then I found out lifting weights was no fun until I discovered I could do it with my friends. Social support can go a long way when developing new habits. 

Here are a couple of ways you can make listening more social and fun:

  1. Join a weekly meetup group focused on listening practice. Search for “NVC” or “compassionate communication” on www.meetup.com in your area.

  2. Join my weekly Listening Practice Group every 5PM CST every Monday at this Zoom link.

  3. If you prefer not to be around strangers, look in the mirror or open a google chat and have a conversation with yourself. The idea is to have something outside of yourself to feel like another person is there. Speak to yourself like how you would speak to a friend to help you connect better to what you are feeling. Empathy starts with you. Start what the questions, “How am I feeling right now?” and “Why do I feel how I feel?” Then, see where the conversation gets you.

Perhaps something is calling you to make a shift. Perhaps you're tired of feeling misunderstood or frustrated or sad about the unresolved conflicts in your relationships. Perhaps something is calling you to take interest in empathic listening. Take a moment. Do you hear the call?

Like the time my sister reached out to me. I heard the call.

I felt scared but also safe and ready to connect. I picked up the phone and was glad I did. I hope you will too.


Dao Nguyen Contributing Author.png

Dao Nguyen
Contributing Author

 
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Jessica Nguyen Jessica Nguyen

How to Achieve Your Career Goals

 

(3-minute read)

Remember when you were a kid and were excited about who you wanted to be? 

How’s that going?

Like most people, you may feel stuck, miserable at your job, or unsure if you’re making the right career moves. You’re not alone in this journey, and it’s okay to feel lost. Just because you are not where you want to be at this very moment does not mean that you are not on track to succeed. 

What can you do to regain control of your career and happiness?

Answer: Conduct a Career Vision Exercise.

A Career Vision Exercise is a reflective activity that evaluates your current career situation against your original desires and personal values and helps you become more self-aware of the actions you can take to bridge any gap. If there is a disconnect between what you want to do and the work you’re actually doing, then there is most likely some degree of dissatisfaction, frustration, or confusion with your career or current job. On the flip side, when you prioritize your purpose and values, you win.

How does it work?

This Career Vision Exercise contains three sections of questions that help you reflect on your experiences and potential actions:

  • Section A: Your purpose and values

  • Section B: Your dream job

  • Section C: What you’ll need to achieve your career aspirations

This is one of my favorite exercises I do with my coaching clients. I recommend trying this out by having a trusted peer asking you these questions or feel free to reach out to me directly for a complimentary coaching intake session. Click here to learn more about Feed Learning coaching sessions.

There are no right or wrong answers to these questions, and some of them may not apply to you, so answer to the best of your ability. Also, the more thorough your answers, the more you’ll get out of the exercise. I generally find spending 60 minutes on this exercise is ideal.

Here’s the Career Vision Exercise

Section A: Your Purpose and Values 

  1. What do you feel are the 2-3 work-related things you do that are better than anybody else (or have been told that you’re really good at)? Why do you think that is?

  2. What are 2-3 skills you enjoy that you’ve used in your previous work experience, but not so much in your current role? Why do you enjoy these skills?

  3. What do you enjoy most about your current job? Why?

  4. What is the career accomplishment you are most proud of? Why? 

  5. What are the values you will never compromise? Why?

  6. What are the top 2-3 things you’re most passionate about? Alternatively, what are the types of projects at work you enjoy doing but most people dread? Why?

  7. What do you want to be known for at work? Alternatively, what would you hate for others to say about you at work? Why?

  8. What is a common theme you see in the answers you’ve provided to the questions in Section A? Why do you think that is?


Section B: Your Dream Job

  1. What are your short-term and long-term goals?

  2. What is your dream job? (It’s okay if you don’t know this answer).

  3. What does your dream job involve you doing? Why is that important to you?

  4. Describe the people you are working with at your dream job. What qualities do they possess?

  5. How does your dream job align with your most important values stated in Section A?

  6. Do you feel you are headed in the right direction in obtaining your dream job? Why or why not?


Section C: What You’ll Need to Achieve Your Career Aspirations

  1. What are the skills you need to develop to help you achieve your short-term and long-term goals? Why? Check out the Feed Learning Skills Library if you need ideas.

  2. What are the skills you currently possess that will help you achieve your short-term and long-term goals?

  3. What role at your current company (or at another company) can get you one step closer to your dream job?

  4. What are the special projects you can partake in at work or outside your job to get you closer to your dream job and build the skills you need to achieve your goals? (This can also include training courses, professional networks, conversations with others, etc.)

  5. Who are the people you admire, respect their opinions, and can ask to be on your Personal Board of Directors* to help get you to where you want to be? For what reason would you choose each person?

  6. What are the things you need from your manager, colleagues, or members of your Personal Board of Directors to help you reach your goals? (e.g., clearer direction on project goals, career development discussions, conflict mediation)

* A Personal Board of Directors is an informal group of people you can call on for guidance and mentorship. There is no formal action you need to take for them to be part of your board. You can simply let them know that you admire their guidance in your career and ask them questions as needed.

Now what?

Now that you have reflected on who you are and where you want to be, it’s time to take action and control of your career. Try taking the following steps:

The very first step to improvement is self-awareness. The Career Vision Exercise questions will help you identify the core values and north star that guides your happiness. It’s up to you to decide what action you want to take next to complete that journey.

Cheers and good luck!
Jesse

 
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I'm Launching a Podcast

 

Every time I visit my mother-in-law’s house in Brooklyn Heights, I am greeted by a simple piece of art when I walk through the front entrance.

Modern Art

This image has resonated with me and I’m reminded of it every time I have an idea that I do not bring to fruition.

I know I can’t be the only person who feels this way about herself--you have neat business ideas or personal projects you want to build out, but it’s all pushed aside and hidden in your electronic folder labeled “IDEAS” because you’re unsure of its success...and then life happens.

Life did happen to me this past year. I’m a new mom, and any parent can tell you that you have even less time to pursue ideas when you have children who need your attention. During the first 3 months of parenthood, I struggled--not only because I had to learn how to keep a human being alive, but also I did not want to lose my identity. I had to change my inner dialogue to say: If you really want it, you will find a way to make it happen.

With that said, I’m doing it. I’m launching a podcast. It’s called People Podcast. 

Feed Learning People Podcast E0 Episode 1 - Hello hello! with Jessica Nguyen

How I plan to differentiate People Podcast from other wonderful, inspirational, career-related podcasts out there is that I’ll interview guests who are open, vulnerable and will share their thought process on how they navigated sticky situations in the workplace. Some of the guests may be working professionals, some may be going through a career change, others may be leaders. Some may be in tech, education or retail, and others may be in a totally different industry. 

I feel that no matter your job, your level, or your industry, we are all people who encounter the same conflicts in our career. We’ve sometimes lost confidence in our abilities, we’ve had to go through numerous interviews, we’ve had difficult conversations with our managers, we’ve avoided people we didn’t like, we’ve had to fight for a pay raise, etc.

If you’re like me, you’re curious to know how others view the world and how they approach people-related problems. I discuss this in Episode 2 with my cousin Thuy Jacobson--you can gain so much perspective and learn so much from other people’s experiences and mistakes. 

Although I am in HR and Learning & Development by trade, I don’t have all the best answers, or even all the answers, but I know we collectively do. That’s what I hope to do with this podcast--help us learn from each other. 

Thanks for listening,
Jesse

 
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Forming New Habits - What I Learned in 2018

 

TL;DR:

  • In this blog, I’ll share with you my journey of breaking old habits, forming new habits and investing in myself in 2018.

  • To successfully build a new habit, be knowledgeable on why it’s important, learn the skills on how to form the habit, and find the right motivation to keep your goal.

  • If you feel stuck, ask yourself: What one thing could I do that if I did it on a regular basis, would make a tremendous positive difference in my personal and/or professional life?

 
 
Slow down and Smell the roses

I still remember my high school mentor Mrs. Maxwell saying multiple times throughout secondary school, “Jessica, you need to slow down and smell the roses.’

I didn’t take her advice. I had tunnel vision and brushed off any unsolicited remarks that suggested me to slow down. I believed my diligence and toughness would take me to places, and I proved her wrong for the next 15 years.

I functioned on auto-pilot for most of my life--60-hour work weeks were the norm, a non-stop schedule meant I was important, and fatigue was a signal to push harder. I continuously challenged myself because I saw results.

As a by-product of not being mindful of the effects of my behaviors, I’ve accumulated bad habits and a feeling of mental dullness over the years. I worked longer hours but didn’t get promoted. I took on more projects but didn’t get a raise. I played more volleyball but wasn’t getting any better. I was building up stress and a hopeless paradigm that didn’t reap what I sowed.

So I pushed the reset button in 2018.

2018 was the year I rebuilt and rebranded myself. It was the year I started to feel more comfortable and less guilty about investing in the “slow down” signs Mrs. Maxwell once suggested. I realized what got me here today won’t necessarily get me there tomorrow, so I had to change my old ways, pause...and form new habits.

According to Stephen Covey, “a habit is the intersection of knowledge, skill, and desire. Knowledge is the what to do and the why. Skill is how to do. And desire is the motivation, the want to do. In order to make something a habit in our lives, we must have all three.”

It wasn’t easy.

It’s rare that we’re able to perfectly align all three components of a habit, but when we do, it feels damn good. I’d like to share with you a couple of my winning moments this past year.


Healthy eating habits
 
 

Habit #1: Healthy Eating

Knowledge

I know my daily Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and King Size Kit Kat cravings were not helping my sluggishness, so I had to change my eating habits to a healthier and more nutritious diet.


Skill

My husband and I agreed to follow the Whole30 meal plan together and be each other’s accountability partners. Through this journey, we identified foods that were causing us certain negative reactions and alternatives that helped us feel better. Nowadays, before I eat something potentially bad, I ask myself “Would I feel bad after eating it?” If the answer is yes, I ask “Is it worth it?”


Desire

My aunt Co Khuong once told me “If you don’t have your health, you have nothing else.” I understood that as I need to take care of my well-being first and foremost via better eating, more exercising, meditating and self-care. Once I take care of myself, I can better take care of those around me.


Status

I incorporate more leafy greens in my diet and feel more in control of my mood and energy level. Though I still eat sweets, chips, and processed foods, I don’t eat bad food when I have a big presentation or need to stay focused.

Say no to my boss
 
 

Habit #2: Saying “no” to my boss

Knowledge

I was the employee who would do everything my manager assigned to me, but the more I did, the more burnout I felt. I had to learn how to tactfully say “no” to my boss in order to give my best performance.


Skill

Any time a manager or colleague asked me to help with a project or task, I asked myself:

a) Does it align with my goals and responsibilities?
b) Is it worth my time?

If “no” was an answer to either question, I would:

  • Provide an alternative solution that involved me to a lesser extent (Remove myself)

  • Ask my boss to reprioritize my workload, “I want to be able to work on these projects without compromising our quality. How would you like me to reprioritize my current workload?” (Something needs to give)

  • Suggest to my boss, “Working on X doesn’t align with our current goals” or “I believe XYZ are current priorities for our team. I won’t be able to do ABC without compromising the quality of our output.” (Straight up “no”)


Desire

I was motivated to have a job I loved and not build resentment for my boss.


Status

When I was working in corporate earlier in 2018, I declined several requests from my manager and head of HR. It has taken me so many years to muster up the confidence to say “no” to a leader, but at the end of the day, I did it. I feel more in control of my attitude towards work when I speak my mind.


I still struggle to have all three components in some habits, but I’ve found that the following tips have made the process a little easier.

 
 

5 things that made it easier for me to form new habits

  1. Practice mindfulness to pull yourself out of auto-pilot. Pay more attention to your surroundings, your sensations, and the details all around you by asking yourself every day “Am I awake? Am I aware? Is this what I want?”

  2. Have an accountability partner. If you’re starting a diet, get the whole household involved. If you’re trying to improve your conflict resolution skills, ask a colleague to call you out each time you interrupt the speaker. Sharing your journey with someone else will keep you honest and feeling motivated and supported throughout the journey.

  3. Share your goals publicly. Similar to the previous tip, don’t keep your goals and resolutions hidden on a piece of paper in your drawer--you’ll either forget about it or won’t accomplish it because you know no one is watching you. The more people who know about your goal, the more you’ll hold yourself accountable (to save yourself from embarrassment).

  4. Make it easily accessible. If you want to drink more water, put bottles of water on your desk. If you need to floss more often, place floss picks on your dining table so it’s right in front of you when you need it. The less effort it takes, the more likely you’ll do it.

  5. Read about your new habit.  I recently read, “Someone who doesn’t read is no better than someone who can’t read.” I find this so true. The more you learn or hear about your habit in other forms, the better equipped you’ll be to tackle it.


 
 

I hope you found these tips helpful and would love to hear what you’re doing to form new habits. Message me at jesse@feedlearning.com!

I’ll leave you with one question: What one thing could you do (something you aren’t doing now), that if you did it on a regular basis, would make a tremendous positive difference in your personal or professional life?

Happy learning and Happy New Year!

Cheers,
Jesse

 
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4 Tips to Write a Promotion-Worthy Self-Review

 

TL;DR:

  • To write an impressive self-review, share your accomplishments and areas of opportunity in a story sequence that highlights the specific actions you took, the results you achieved, the impact you had on the organization, and the skills you developed throughout the process.

  • Use this Self-Review Template to help you write your self-review.


I like to see the self-review as a free pass to professionally brag about the contributions you made to the company and how you added value to the business. This is not a time to be modest about all the sweat and tears you put into your work, instead, it should be an opportunity to proudly share the incredible results you produced. I mean, who else is going to vouch for you besides your mom?

While you’re writing about your accomplishments, you’ll also need to be honest about 2-3 areas for continuous learning and improvement. You can discuss projects where you fell short or emphasize skills you’d like to develop to produce more favorable results for your organization.

In this blog, I’ll share with you four actions you can take to make your self-review more impressive. To supplement the reading, I’ve also created a template you can use to jumpstart your process, including where to gather all the data for your self-review.

Turn your self-review into a short story

1. Tell a series of short stories.

I've had the chance to review hundreds of self-reviews in my experience, and unfortunately, too many do not do the employee justice. The most ineffective reviews are the ones that only share a list of accomplishments. Even if you share a remarkable set of achievements, the longer the list does not necessarily mean the more valuable the employee.

Look at the goals you set forth for this past review cycle, and tell a series of 3-5 short stories that spotlight your significant achievements or areas of opportunity connected to the business goals and objectives. Writing in a story format is a great way to show your perspective on the rigorous process it took to achieve your goals--this helps remind your manager of your effort and contributions that they may otherwise have forgotten. You should be able to paraphrase your value to your manager within 4-7 sentences for each story.

  • For each accomplishment, share the problem or project you had to overcome, the actions you took to resolve it, the results you've achieved, and the impact you made for everyone around you. Focus on the value you add to the company.

  • For each area of opportunity, share the area you’d like to improve, actions you plan to take to produce more favorable results, why it’s important to develop this skill, and any lessons learned throughout the process. Focus on your growth and development and how you will continue to add value in the future.

Growth and Development

2. Highlight your growth via skills you developed.

Most skills are transferable. When you emphasize a skill you developed, you illustrate your growth potential, making it easier for your manager to consider you for future projects or roles that require those transferable skills. Whereas if you only mention projects you've completed, there may not be another time you’ll work on that project again (but there will be plenty of opportunities when you’ll use the skills you developed in that project). In other words, the project lifecycle ends when you've completed it, but the skills lifecycle carries on to future projects.

Note: When your manager and HR are considering you for a promotion or raise, they’re measuring the skills you possess in addition to the projects you’ve completed.

Ask yourself: “What am I able to do today that I wasn’t able to do last year? How have my interpersonal, technical, business or functional skills improved?’ or ‘What skills would I like to improve?’

Example: This year I excelled in my project management skills while working on the Netsuite integration.

Specific and Actionable Examples

3. Provide specific, actionable examples.

With any story, supporting facts are needed to paint a picture and help the reader understand the information. In your self-review, you want to provide examples of specific actions you took to help reach your accomplishment, or things you can do differently to obtain a better result.

Ask yourself: ‘What observable actions did I take to help me achieve my goal?’ or ‘What can I do moving forward to produce more favorable results?’

Example: I was able to help our company meet the July 1st go-live date by ensuring all parties did their share of the project. Anytime we were running behind schedule, I called, emailed, or pinged stakeholders to remind them of the deadlines and their role in the overall success of the project. I also facilitated check-in meetings to update everyone on the project status and obtained feedback to better the process.

Show your business impact

4. Show your impact.

This is your chance to illustrate that you are an asset. Think about the impact your contributions have made or will make on the team, department or company, and use quantifiable facts with supporting qualitative evidence to portray your value.


Ask yourself:
“How did I make the experience for my colleagues or customers more positive? Did I support company growth, increase revenue or help acquire more customers? Did I reduce expenses, save time or make the process more efficient for those around me?’ or ‘How will I be able to add value in the future?’

Example: With the successful, timely implementation of Netsuite, we are able to increase our data integrity with a better system and workflow for everyone involved, and no longer will have to cross-reference multiple spreadsheets for the most accurate data (which is very time-consuming and frustrating for the team). We also helped the company save a projected $50,000 in additional consultation fees. These savings will allow us to redirect our focus on the technical training essential to helping us build out our video strategy next year.


Ready to try it out?

For those of you who just received a reminder email from HR to complete your self-review pronto, I’ve created a couple of templates to help you get started.

Examples of Weak and Strong Self-Reviews - I find it can be helpful when you see a comparison of what good and bad look like.

Self-Review Template - I sometimes get writer's block so find it helpful to write down my thoughts when specific questions are asked to me. When you’re ready to write your review, use this template to guide you through a step-by-step self-review process.

Good luck! For more support, contact us at hello@feedlearning.com.

Happy learning!

Jesse
Founder, Feed Learning

 
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Are your employees learning the right skills to grow your business?

 
Learning Needs Analysis and Performance Gap Analysis
 
 

The full blog is a 10-minute read. Below is a summary of items discussed.

TL;DR:

  • Conduct a Learning Needs Analysis to pinpoint the necessary training programs that help your company thrive.

  • Allocate training budget on customizable programs rather than blanket training courses to get the biggest ROI.

  • Use this Learning Needs Analysis Interview Template to record data when interviewing business leaders on priority learning topics.

 

 

Training -- it’s been on your mind. You know that for your team to continuously meet and exceed company expectations, you have to upskill employees with the knowledge that helps them become smarter and more productive. However, how do you know if they’re learning the right skills that link to closing performance gaps?

Imagine a leader says to you, “Hey, we need to offer communication skills training at this company.” How would you respond?

Effective probing questions you can ask the leader are, “Why do you think we need communication skills?’ or “What do communication skills look like to you?’ I’ll share with you a complete list of questions later in this blog to help you ensure the potential money and effort you spend on future training programs are tackling critical performance issues.

Which brings me to the heart of this blog...

Conducting the Learning Needs Analysis

 
 
Screen Shot 2018-11-15 at 10.57.12 AM.png
 
 

Conducting a Learning Needs Analysis for your company is similar to doing your thorough research on Car Max and Consumer Reports before buying a new car. You wouldn’t want to purchase any car that looks like a car; Similarly, you wouldn’t want to purchase a training program just because the word “training” was stamped on it.

What if you bought a brand new Jeep Grand Cherokee but realized later that the Jeep isn’t meeting your needs of saving money because you’re filling your gas tank every four days? Alternatively, what if you purchased a communication skills training and found out a year later that a conflict resolution program would have been more helpful to resolve current (and prevent future) problems?

In both cases, you could make adjustments by investing in other solutions, though illustrating what or why you need it before spending any budget could have prevented you from the trouble of making a miscalculated purchase.

 
 

 
 

What is the goal of the Learning Needs Analysis? The goal is to ask business leaders a series of questions that pinpoint the specific behaviors and examples, not generalizations, of how and why employees are falling short and areas they need to improve. This information will help you determine the best training program to reach optimal, targeted performance.

Who can conduct the analysis? Any person involved in overall employee learning i.e., L&D team, HRBP, manager, special task force, consultant, etc.

Which leaders do you interview? You can extract this data from the top 1-2% of business leaders in your company. For the most accurate details, use a diverse group of business leaders who represent your employee population and are attuned to their team’s performance. You can also interview or survey high-potential employees who will eventually benefit from these training courses and can provide their perspective on learning needs.

How long does the process take? Depending on the size of the company, it can take anywhere from a couple of hours to a couple of weeks to complete. Set aside at least 30 minutes to speak with each business leader, plus additional time to analyze the data.

The trick to the analysis is to see what the business leaders see. Some of us are not in the trenches of day-to-day business operations, so we may not have the best perspective on employee behaviors. With that in mind, be sure to ask thoughtful questions to see through the lens of a leader.

What questions do you ask the business leader? First make sure you record their name, title, business unit, and location so you can follow up with them if needed. The diagram below shows five questions, sample responses and an explanation of why each question is important.

 
 

I want to highlight question #2. This is the most significant question you can ask to identify underlying behaviors that produce more favorable results. For example, here are descriptions I’ve heard from one company on what exhibiting communication skills look like:

Leader A: Being more clear and concise in your emails

Leader B: Not talking too much in a meeting

Leader C: Actively listening to what the other person is saying and not interrupting them

Leader D: Not being argumentative and being able to see eye-to-eye with the engineers (Note: some people label this behavior as conflict resolution skills instead).

As you can see, everyone has their definition of communication skills. If we were to offer a general communication skills training to the above company, we might not be able to tackle some of the specific behaviors previously shared. I find this common in many organizations as they give in to the check-the-box mentality--they offer a training curriculum with general professional development courses because it’s good foundational knowledge, not necessarily the knowledge that results in meeting business objectives. Being able to identify the observable behaviors will help you choose the right training program and learning objectives for your team to measurably close performance gaps.

If you’re in a smaller organization, it may be easier to diagnose the exact learning needs due to a smaller pool of data. However, if you’re in a larger company with multiple business units, you may find yourself with a list of 20+ competing learning topics and not knowing where to start. How do you know which one will give your organization the highest ROI?

Identifying the Emerging Trends

 
 
 
 

Once you’ve collected and analyzed all the data, you’ll come to find that some learning topics are outliers and specific to a particular business function, and others are repeated across different departments.

Let’s say that you interviewed a total of 5 business leaders in your learning needs analysis. In the simplified table below, you can see that the Engineering function said their top 3 learning needs are AWS Training, Conflict Resolution, and General Management Skills. The Finance function said their top 3 learning needs are Communication, Conflict Resolution and General Management Skills, and so on.

 
 
Sample results of Learning Needs Analysis and Performance Gap Analysis
 
 

The Outlier. Notice that the Engineering function is the only department that needs AWS training. Assuming you have a limited budget, consider offering training programs that help return a higher ROI and impact more teams rather than a niche group. You can also recommend the Engineering function to find money within their budget to cover the cost of this training.

The Trends. You can see that all of the functions have a common theme of needing Conflict Resolution skills, and everyone but the Engineering team needs Communication Skills training. (Even though Engineering didn’t mention Communication Skills as a top learning need, you can still offer it to them). These are the top two training topics that may produce the highest ROI for your organization. It’s hard to break down a learning needs analysis to an exact science, so anecdotal knowledge from leaders and asking the right questions will help you be as accurate as possible.

For further analysis, you can also break down this information by organizational categories such as business unit, experience level, and office location.

Selecting the Right Training Programs

 
 
Screen Shot 2018-11-16 at 1.16.19 PM.png
 
 

Now that you know the learning topics that will be most beneficial to your company, it’s time to pick which training programs and courses you want to provide your employees. For each of the learning topics, look at the behaviors you’re trying to tackle and compare it to the learning outcomes the vendors are advertising. The training is not effective unless it addresses the underlying behavior you’re trying to resolve at your company, so look for a vendor that is flexible and can also customize the learning content.

Try it out

To get you started, I’ve created a couple of free templates you can use:

Learning Needs Analysis Interview Template - Jot down your notes on this Google Doc when meeting with your business leaders.

Learning Needs Analysis Survey - For those of you who have an incompatible schedule with your business leaders, you can also send them this Google Form and have them complete it on their own time. Follow up with them at a later date to probe on their responses, as necessary. Due to Google Forms limitations, you won’t be able to download this survey but shoot me an email at jesse@feedlearning.com, and I’d be happy to share a copy you can save to your Drive and customize.

 
 

Good luck!

Take out the guessing, and let me do the legwork for you. Contact me at hello@feedlearning.com to learn how you can receive powerful data about your company’s learning needs.

Happy Learning,

Jesse
Founder, Feed Learning

 
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